And the countdown continues. Here are the next 20 quotes of me!! I can't wait to hear your thoughts and comments!
60. Kronk: No, no, it’s not you. There’s a wall there. (Emperor’s New Groove)
59. Don Juan: No woman has ever left my arms unsatisfied. (Don Juan DeMarco)
58. Peasant: Come see the violence inherent in the system. Come see the violence inherent in the system! Help, help, I’m being repressed! (Holy Grail)
57. Jan: I'm sorry, all I heard was 'Blah, blah, blah, I'm a dirty tramp!' (Mr. Deeds)
56. Schatze: [A potential husband should have a …] Class address, class background, class character…to be specific about it, nothing under six figures a year.
Loco: I’ve never heard anything so intelligent in my life. (How to Marry a Millionaire)
55. Cole Porter: If I can survive this movie, I can survive anything. (De-Lovely)
54. R.F.: It’ll be a sensation! Lamont and Lockwood: They Talk!
Lena: Well of course we talk, don’t everybody? (Singin in the Rain)
53. Kate: I don't know what they taught you in France, but rude and interesting are not the same things. (French Kiss)
52. Lloyd: You know what I'm going to get you next Christmas, Mom? A big wooden cross, so that every time you feel unappreciated for your sacrifices, you can climb on up and nail yourself to it. (The Ref)
51. Leia: Why you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy looking, nerfherder.
Han: Who’s scruffy looking? (The Empire Strikes Back)
50. Henry Jones: I didn't know you could fly a plane.
Indiana: Fly, yes. Land, no. (Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade)
49. Benedick: They say the lady is fair, 'tis a truth, I can bear them witness; and virtuous, 'tis so, I cannot reprove it; and wise, but for loving me - by my troth, it is no addition to her wit, nor no great argument of her folly; for I will be horribly in love with her. (Much Ado About Nothing)
48. Westley: There’s a shortage of perfect breasts in the world, t’would be a pity to damage yours. (The Princess Bride)
47. Joe: You're not a girl! You're a guy! Why would a guy wanna marry a guy?
Jerry: Security! (Some Like it Hot)
46. Sorsha: I dwell in darkness without you and it went away? (Willow)
45. Barney: Why d’ya have t’look so beautiful? If your nose were shiny or your eyes dull… anything to make it easier…but you have t’come in here lookin’ like a chorus ‘a angels… (Young at Heart)
44. Peter: You can't listen to this and not dance! (Swing Kids)
43. Jack: I'd say that she gets under your skin as soon as you meet her. She drives you so nuts that you don't know whether to hug her or really--arm wrestle her. She would go all the way to Europe just to get a stamp in her passport. I don't know if that amounts to insanity or just being really, really {pause} likeable....(While You Were Sleeping)
42. Nick: I believe that the woman cares.
Nora: I don’t care. It’s just that I’m used to you, that’s all. (The Thin Man)
41. Lt. Doyle: People do a lot of things in private they couldn't possibly explain in public. (Rear Window)
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Monday, February 26, 2007
The Brothers Grimm
A Suberbly Fantastic Waste of Time!
Sometimes I'm just in the mood for a fun, fantastical, cheesy movie. I can't sum up a long day better, than by curling up on my couch with a blanket and pillow and popping in some mindless entertainment. Such was the case yesterday.
While flipping through one of God's greatest creations, Video On-
Demand (Offered by my cable company; who is not paying me, so they get no mention! Kate - 1, Cable Company - 0...score!), I stumbled across Terry Gilliam's The Brothers Grimm starring Heath Ledger and Matt Damon. I saw this in the theatre and had recently been wanting to watch it again; so I muted the phone, fed my puppy, turned up the surround sound and settled back on my chaise lounge.
I was a little late when I jumped on the Gilliam bandwagon. My first of his movies was 12 Monkeys. I was immediately hooked. Shortly thereafter, I began catching up; The Fisher King, The Adventures of Baron Munchausen and just about all the Monty Python I could get my hands on. Some I liked, some I didn't. However, I have always enjoyed Gilliam's juxtaposition of reality and fantasy.
Grimm was really no exception. Let me start by saying, all-in-all I really enjoyed the movie. However, I can only rate it a weak 3 stars, because of the movie's less-than-stellar ending. Without giving anything away (in case you want to watch it), I'll just say that it was unbelievably predictable and extremely silly and cliché.
That having been said, I thought the rest of the movie was rather pleasant. Damon and Ledger were hilarious in their roles as Will and Jacob Grimm (respectively), who traversed French-occupied Germany in 1811 ridding villages of ghosts, ghouls and banshees alike. More like The Three Amigos than demonic exorcisers, the brothers find themselves forced to go to a small village (by the always exceptional Jonathan Pryce) which has been plagued by the disappearance of several young girls. Needless to say, mayhem ensues as our would-be heroes find themselves in over their heads.
The Brothers Grimm is certainly not the greatest movie ever made, nor is it the shining star in Terry Gilliam's galaxy of work; but if you're looking for a fun movie to help you escape from the real world, Grimm is as good as any...if you can get past the ending. Ha!
Sometimes I'm just in the mood for a fun, fantastical, cheesy movie. I can't sum up a long day better, than by curling up on my couch with a blanket and pillow and popping in some mindless entertainment. Such was the case yesterday.
While flipping through one of God's greatest creations, Video On-
Demand (Offered by my cable company; who is not paying me, so they get no mention! Kate - 1, Cable Company - 0...score!), I stumbled across Terry Gilliam's The Brothers Grimm starring Heath Ledger and Matt Damon. I saw this in the theatre and had recently been wanting to watch it again; so I muted the phone, fed my puppy, turned up the surround sound and settled back on my chaise lounge.I was a little late when I jumped on the Gilliam bandwagon. My first of his movies was 12 Monkeys. I was immediately hooked. Shortly thereafter, I began catching up; The Fisher King, The Adventures of Baron Munchausen and just about all the Monty Python I could get my hands on. Some I liked, some I didn't. However, I have always enjoyed Gilliam's juxtaposition of reality and fantasy.
Grimm was really no exception. Let me start by saying, all-in-all I really enjoyed the movie. However, I can only rate it a weak 3 stars, because of the movie's less-than-stellar ending. Without giving anything away (in case you want to watch it), I'll just say that it was unbelievably predictable and extremely silly and cliché.
That having been said, I thought the rest of the movie was rather pleasant. Damon and Ledger were hilarious in their roles as Will and Jacob Grimm (respectively), who traversed French-occupied Germany in 1811 ridding villages of ghosts, ghouls and banshees alike. More like The Three Amigos than demonic exorcisers, the brothers find themselves forced to go to a small village (by the always exceptional Jonathan Pryce) which has been plagued by the disappearance of several young girls. Needless to say, mayhem ensues as our would-be heroes find themselves in over their heads.
The Brothers Grimm is certainly not the greatest movie ever made, nor is it the shining star in Terry Gilliam's galaxy of work; but if you're looking for a fun movie to help you escape from the real world, Grimm is as good as any...if you can get past the ending. Ha!
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Half Nelson
Why Depression is Fun!
When I leave a movie feeling like I need to either kill myself or get doped-up on anti-depressants -- all the while feeling somehow empowered to fight the forces of oppression and unite the world...I know I've seen an Oscar-worthy movie.
As I was watching Half Nelson last night, I made a mental list of all the emotions and feelings I experienced....things like: unease, discomfort, pain, pity and even nausea. (Which, admittedly, is very weird...but true.) After it was over, I wrote them all down and slept on it. Those feelings haven't really changed.
First and foremost, the movie was incredibly powerful. The script is minimal and frequently depends on the talent of its actors to convey the message through action and expression. They do not disappoint.
I had heard a great deal of buzz about Ryan Gosling's performance as Dan Dunne, the drug-addicted history teacher of an inner-city Brooklyn school. In fact, in a recent poll on IMDB, he came in second overall as a favorite dark horse candidate to steal an Oscar from the anticipated recipient. Now I know why. Gosling delivered one of the most compelling and understated performances I've ever seen by such a young actor. So believable, in fact, that it honestly made me hope he doesn't fall into a similar career path as River Phoenix. (It was Phoenix's role in My Own Private Idaho that is rumoured to be the cause of his drug addiction and subsequent death in 1993.)
Dunne is discovered strung out in the girls locker room by 13 year-old Drey, one of his latch-key students. What follows is a relationship between the two that, while it never actually crosses the Mary Kay Letourneau line of indecency, becomes painfully uncomfortable from time to time. I found myself yelling at the TV in a vain attempt to keep young Dunne from losing his job. He doesn't, of course, because the movie isn't about physically inappropriate teacher-student relationships. The movie is about one young man's struggle to come to a realization that he alone can't change the world. He escapes to a drug-induced haze to deal with life and in a way comes to depend on young Drey to find a little hope.
There was one thing about this movie that aggravated me. I don't care much for screenwriters who interject whiney idealistic politics into their storyline. There are a few references by Dunne and his parents that garnered eye-rolls and some "Good Lords" out of me, but they were brief and I was grateful.
All-in-all, though, Half Nelson was exceptional. A commanding story that showcases the magnificent talent of its actors. Shareeka Epps turns in a wonderful performance that earned her (and co-star Gosling) top honours at the 2007 Independent Spirit Awards. Nelson isn't for everyone...so watch at your own risk. However, it undeniably grabs it's audience with raw and powerful emotion and doesn't let go. Superb. 4 Stars.
When I leave a movie feeling like I need to either kill myself or get doped-up on anti-depressants -- all the while feeling somehow empowered to fight the forces of oppression and unite the world...I know I've seen an Oscar-worthy movie.As I was watching Half Nelson last night, I made a mental list of all the emotions and feelings I experienced....things like: unease, discomfort, pain, pity and even nausea. (Which, admittedly, is very weird...but true.) After it was over, I wrote them all down and slept on it. Those feelings haven't really changed.
First and foremost, the movie was incredibly powerful. The script is minimal and frequently depends on the talent of its actors to convey the message through action and expression. They do not disappoint.
I had heard a great deal of buzz about Ryan Gosling's performance as Dan Dunne, the drug-addicted history teacher of an inner-city Brooklyn school. In fact, in a recent poll on IMDB, he came in second overall as a favorite dark horse candidate to steal an Oscar from the anticipated recipient. Now I know why. Gosling delivered one of the most compelling and understated performances I've ever seen by such a young actor. So believable, in fact, that it honestly made me hope he doesn't fall into a similar career path as River Phoenix. (It was Phoenix's role in My Own Private Idaho that is rumoured to be the cause of his drug addiction and subsequent death in 1993.)
Dunne is discovered strung out in the girls locker room by 13 year-old Drey, one of his latch-key students. What follows is a relationship between the two that, while it never actually crosses the Mary Kay Letourneau line of indecency, becomes painfully uncomfortable from time to time. I found myself yelling at the TV in a vain attempt to keep young Dunne from losing his job. He doesn't, of course, because the movie isn't about physically inappropriate teacher-student relationships. The movie is about one young man's struggle to come to a realization that he alone can't change the world. He escapes to a drug-induced haze to deal with life and in a way comes to depend on young Drey to find a little hope.
There was one thing about this movie that aggravated me. I don't care much for screenwriters who interject whiney idealistic politics into their storyline. There are a few references by Dunne and his parents that garnered eye-rolls and some "Good Lords" out of me, but they were brief and I was grateful.
All-in-all, though, Half Nelson was exceptional. A commanding story that showcases the magnificent talent of its actors. Shareeka Epps turns in a wonderful performance that earned her (and co-star Gosling) top honours at the 2007 Independent Spirit Awards. Nelson isn't for everyone...so watch at your own risk. However, it undeniably grabs it's audience with raw and powerful emotion and doesn't let go. Superb. 4 Stars.
Monday, February 19, 2007
The 100 Quotes of Me...80 - 61
And the list of k8's 100 Quotes of Me continues...
Let your mind wander and if your muse speaks some of your favorite quotes, comment and share with the world! :)
80. Thomas: I'm a cowboy, and you're a pansy. (Swing Kids)
79. Christian: Love is a many-splendored thing. Love, lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love. (Moulin Rouge)
78. Milton: My body is a roadmap of pain! (The Frighteners)
77. Edna: Supermodels. Heh! Nothing super about them... spoiled, stupid little stick figures with poofy lips who think only about themselves. (The Incredibles)
76. Dorothy: The chaperone’s job is to make sure nobody else has fun. Nobody chaperones the chaperone. (Gentlemen Prefer Blondes)
75. Mrs. White: Flies are where men are most vulnerable. (Clue)
74. Dory: I shall call you squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my squishy. (Finding Nemo)
73. Han Solo: That's a good story. I think you just can't bear to let a gorgeous guy like me out of your sight. (The Empire Strikes Back)
72. Lloyd: You think every morning I wake up, look in the mirror and say "Gee I'm glad I'm me and not some 19-year-old billionaire rockstar with the body of an athlete and a 24-hour erection!" No I don't! So just excuse the shit out of me! (The Ref)
71. Indiana: It's not the years, honey, it's the mileage. (Raiders of the Lost Ark)
70. Claudio: Then down on her knee she falls! Beats her heart, tears her hair, curses, “Oh Sweet Benedick, God Give Me Patience!!!” (Much Ado About Nothing)
69. Quiz Kid Donnie: I used to be smart, but now I'm just stupid. (Magnolia)
68. Austin Millbarge: We mock what we don't understand. (Spies Like Us)
67. Rick: Are my eyes really brown? (Casablanca)
66. Kate: I mean the kind of love between one man and one woman.
Luc: It is not a very interesting question. It is a question of a little girl who still believes in fairy tales. (French Kiss)
65. Lena: Well, I can’t make love to a bush! (Singin in the Rain)
64. Ellie: Your ego is absolutely colossal.
Peter: Yeah, yeah, not bad, how's yours? (It Happened One Night)
63. Batty: Puff up, puff up. They hate that! (Ferngully)
62. Smee: I’ve just had an apostrophe.
Cpt. Hook: I think you mean epiphany.
Smee: Lightin just struck my brain…(Hook)
61. Osgood: Do you use a bow or do you just pluck it.
Jerry/Daphne: Most of the time I slap it. (Some Like it Hot)
Let your mind wander and if your muse speaks some of your favorite quotes, comment and share with the world! :)
80. Thomas: I'm a cowboy, and you're a pansy. (Swing Kids)
79. Christian: Love is a many-splendored thing. Love, lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love. (Moulin Rouge)
78. Milton: My body is a roadmap of pain! (The Frighteners)
77. Edna: Supermodels. Heh! Nothing super about them... spoiled, stupid little stick figures with poofy lips who think only about themselves. (The Incredibles)
76. Dorothy: The chaperone’s job is to make sure nobody else has fun. Nobody chaperones the chaperone. (Gentlemen Prefer Blondes)
75. Mrs. White: Flies are where men are most vulnerable. (Clue)
74. Dory: I shall call you squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my squishy. (Finding Nemo)
73. Han Solo: That's a good story. I think you just can't bear to let a gorgeous guy like me out of your sight. (The Empire Strikes Back)
72. Lloyd: You think every morning I wake up, look in the mirror and say "Gee I'm glad I'm me and not some 19-year-old billionaire rockstar with the body of an athlete and a 24-hour erection!" No I don't! So just excuse the shit out of me! (The Ref)
71. Indiana: It's not the years, honey, it's the mileage. (Raiders of the Lost Ark)
70. Claudio: Then down on her knee she falls! Beats her heart, tears her hair, curses, “Oh Sweet Benedick, God Give Me Patience!!!” (Much Ado About Nothing)
69. Quiz Kid Donnie: I used to be smart, but now I'm just stupid. (Magnolia)
68. Austin Millbarge: We mock what we don't understand. (Spies Like Us)
67. Rick: Are my eyes really brown? (Casablanca)
66. Kate: I mean the kind of love between one man and one woman.
Luc: It is not a very interesting question. It is a question of a little girl who still believes in fairy tales. (French Kiss)
65. Lena: Well, I can’t make love to a bush! (Singin in the Rain)
64. Ellie: Your ego is absolutely colossal.
Peter: Yeah, yeah, not bad, how's yours? (It Happened One Night)
63. Batty: Puff up, puff up. They hate that! (Ferngully)
62. Smee: I’ve just had an apostrophe.
Cpt. Hook: I think you mean epiphany.
Smee: Lightin just struck my brain…(Hook)
61. Osgood: Do you use a bow or do you just pluck it.
Jerry/Daphne: Most of the time I slap it. (Some Like it Hot)
Smokin' Aces
Smokin' Awesome!
What did the tv commercial say?
Here are the words the New York Times uses to describe Smokin' Aces..."Blam! Blam! Blam! Expletive! Expletive! Plot Twist. FBI. Expletive! Blam! Blam! Blam! Roll Credits."
The ad sold me. The cast cinched the deal. I ask you, how could I possibly turn down Jeremy Piven, Ryan Reynolds, Jason Bateman, Peter Berg, Andy Garcia, Taraji Henson, Ben Affleck and even a cameo by Matthew Fox? (Ok, maybe most of us coulda done without Ben Affleck, but he was GREAT...so let's just let bygones be bygones, shall we?)
Smokin' Aces was awesome! Everything I look for in an action movie. This was one helluva 1 hour 49 minute ride through the wild and crazy world of La Cosa Nostra...with Piven at the center of the mayhem. Like most people I've talked to, I figured out the twist way ahead of time but that doesn't matter...because it's the "getting there" that's the best part.
Here are the words the New York Times uses to describe Smokin' Aces..."Blam! Blam! Blam! Expletive! Expletive! Plot Twist. FBI. Expletive! Blam! Blam! Blam! Roll Credits."
The ad sold me. The cast cinched the deal. I ask you, how could I possibly turn down Jeremy Piven, Ryan Reynolds, Jason Bateman, Peter Berg, Andy Garcia, Taraji Henson, Ben Affleck and even a cameo by Matthew Fox? (Ok, maybe most of us coulda done without Ben Affleck, but he was GREAT...so let's just let bygones be bygones, shall we?)
Smokin' Aces was awesome! Everything I look for in an action movie. This was one helluva 1 hour 49 minute ride through the wild and crazy world of La Cosa Nostra...with Piven at the center of the mayhem. Like most people I've talked to, I figured out the twist way ahead of time but that doesn't matter...because it's the "getting there" that's the best part.
If you enjoy massive amounts of violence, gallons of blood, torture, drugs and prostitutes then you're in the right place! If you don't enjoy that, you might like it anyway because it's just a fun, outlandish and brilliantly engaging story! Even when you know the twist, you have no idea what to expect next.
My Neflix Review: The only way this could've been better, is if Ryan Reynolds had performed the whole thing in a**less boxer-briefs!!
And kudos to the NY Times, they hit the nail right on the head!
**Personal Note to Jeremy Piven**
J - Your awesomeness is not a shock to me. I have been a fan since well before your "10 YEARS!!!" rant in Grosse Pointe Blank. However, I fear your new-found Entourage fame is turning you into an insufferable, pompous, arrogant diva. Do us all a favor and bring yourself back down to earth...you were more likeable before.
My Neflix Review: The only way this could've been better, is if Ryan Reynolds had performed the whole thing in a**less boxer-briefs!!
And kudos to the NY Times, they hit the nail right on the head!
**Personal Note to Jeremy Piven**
J - Your awesomeness is not a shock to me. I have been a fan since well before your "10 YEARS!!!" rant in Grosse Pointe Blank. However, I fear your new-found Entourage fame is turning you into an insufferable, pompous, arrogant diva. Do us all a favor and bring yourself back down to earth...you were more likeable before.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
The 100 Quotes of Me...100 - 81
Lists. I love making lists. My top 5 Johnny Depp movies. My top 5 Action Flicks. My top 5 Guilty Pleasures. I've made a lot of these in my day and I can't tell you how many boring work days have flown by as a result of these little beauties.
Every now and then, though, I get a little more ambitious and make a "100 Greatest" list. In 2001 I created k8's 100 Favorite Movies. That list is really out of date right now, so you don't get to see that one....yet. In late 2004, however, the AFI (American Film Institute) announced it's plans to name the 100 Greatest Movie Quotes in film history. Well, needless to say, my little brain started working. I would say a good 1/3 of my personal lingo comes from movies. Most of my cleverest quips and sayings aren't mine at all (but I do deliver them well, if I do say so myself!) but from the minds of screenwriters.
In order to narrow down the quotes (my drafts included more than 300), I had to come up with a set of guidelines to most accurately narrow down my selections to 100. After much deliberation, I came up with the following:
1. Does it define me as a person or somehow say something about me?
2. Quote-ability. Has it worked its way into my every-day vernacular?
3. Likeability. Is it just fun and memorable?
With the rules defined, I hand-picked my 100 Quotes of Me. Over the next few weeks, I will be posting them for your review and pleasure. Please feel free to comment on the ones you like and others that may stand out for you!
100. Helena: Oh, spite. (Midsummer Night’s Dream)
99. Arvid: Quiz time. Got your glasses on.
Thomas: What?
Arvid: It means you don't know who your friends are. (Swing Kids)
98. Preston: Up until now one could write this off as coincidence. But then she reached into her bag and pulled out a Strawberry Pop Tart—the very same breakfast pastry that I was consuming at that moment! (Can’t Hardly Wait)
97. Benny: It's like taking me to the top of the mountain and showing me the world, and then marching me back down, and saying, "That's what you can't have Benny, you silly great fat article.” (Circle of Friends)
96. Marie: You're right, you're right. I know you're right. (When Harry Met Sally)
95. Indiana: Ahh, Venice. (Last Crusade)
94. Barrie: Yes, well, we dream on a budget here, don’t we? (Finding Neverland)
93. Albert: That sarcastic contemptuous tone that means you know everything because you're a man, and I know nothing because I'm a woman.
Armand: You're not a woman.
Albert: Oh, you bastard! (The Birdcage)
92. Muriel: I refuse to endanger the lives of my children in a house with less than four bathrooms. (Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House)
91. Dorothy: Remember, honey, on your wedding day it’s ok to say yes. (Gentlemen Prefer Blondes)
90. Dr. Lester: I’ve been very lonely in my isolated tower of indecipherable speech. (Being John Malcovich)
89. Rizzo: God save my little broken body. (Muppet’s Christmas Carol)
88. Mrs. White: Get off me! (Clue)
87. Capt. Lewis: Benjamin, you are not fit to wear that uniform.
Benjamin: No shit! (Private Benjamin)
86. Kobayashi: One cannot be betrayed if one has no people. (The Usual Suspects)
85. Mother: Corie, you don’t give a person a chance…at least let me see the whole apartment.
Paul: This is the whole apartment.
Mother: It’s a nice large room. (Barefoot in the Park)
84. Jack: That's right, Mr. Joe Fusco, Jr. He said you two were intimate.
Lucy: Yeah, well he also said he invented aluminum foil, he's delusional. (While You Were Sleeping)
83. Lucas: Who knows where thoughts come from? They just appear. Mmm-hmm. (Empire Records)
82. Randy: I can’t put my arms down! (A Christmas Story)
81. Hansel: Sting would be another person who's a hero. The music he's created over the years, I don't really listen to it, but the fact that he's making it, I respect that. (Zoolander)
Every now and then, though, I get a little more ambitious and make a "100 Greatest" list. In 2001 I created k8's 100 Favorite Movies. That list is really out of date right now, so you don't get to see that one....yet. In late 2004, however, the AFI (American Film Institute) announced it's plans to name the 100 Greatest Movie Quotes in film history. Well, needless to say, my little brain started working. I would say a good 1/3 of my personal lingo comes from movies. Most of my cleverest quips and sayings aren't mine at all (but I do deliver them well, if I do say so myself!) but from the minds of screenwriters.
In order to narrow down the quotes (my drafts included more than 300), I had to come up with a set of guidelines to most accurately narrow down my selections to 100. After much deliberation, I came up with the following:
1. Does it define me as a person or somehow say something about me?
2. Quote-ability. Has it worked its way into my every-day vernacular?
3. Likeability. Is it just fun and memorable?
With the rules defined, I hand-picked my 100 Quotes of Me. Over the next few weeks, I will be posting them for your review and pleasure. Please feel free to comment on the ones you like and others that may stand out for you!
100. Helena: Oh, spite. (Midsummer Night’s Dream)
99. Arvid: Quiz time. Got your glasses on.
Thomas: What?
Arvid: It means you don't know who your friends are. (Swing Kids)
98. Preston: Up until now one could write this off as coincidence. But then she reached into her bag and pulled out a Strawberry Pop Tart—the very same breakfast pastry that I was consuming at that moment! (Can’t Hardly Wait)
97. Benny: It's like taking me to the top of the mountain and showing me the world, and then marching me back down, and saying, "That's what you can't have Benny, you silly great fat article.” (Circle of Friends)
96. Marie: You're right, you're right. I know you're right. (When Harry Met Sally)
95. Indiana: Ahh, Venice. (Last Crusade)
94. Barrie: Yes, well, we dream on a budget here, don’t we? (Finding Neverland)
93. Albert: That sarcastic contemptuous tone that means you know everything because you're a man, and I know nothing because I'm a woman.
Armand: You're not a woman.
Albert: Oh, you bastard! (The Birdcage)
92. Muriel: I refuse to endanger the lives of my children in a house with less than four bathrooms. (Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House)
91. Dorothy: Remember, honey, on your wedding day it’s ok to say yes. (Gentlemen Prefer Blondes)
90. Dr. Lester: I’ve been very lonely in my isolated tower of indecipherable speech. (Being John Malcovich)
89. Rizzo: God save my little broken body. (Muppet’s Christmas Carol)
88. Mrs. White: Get off me! (Clue)
87. Capt. Lewis: Benjamin, you are not fit to wear that uniform.
Benjamin: No shit! (Private Benjamin)
86. Kobayashi: One cannot be betrayed if one has no people. (The Usual Suspects)
85. Mother: Corie, you don’t give a person a chance…at least let me see the whole apartment.
Paul: This is the whole apartment.
Mother: It’s a nice large room. (Barefoot in the Park)
84. Jack: That's right, Mr. Joe Fusco, Jr. He said you two were intimate.
Lucy: Yeah, well he also said he invented aluminum foil, he's delusional. (While You Were Sleeping)
83. Lucas: Who knows where thoughts come from? They just appear. Mmm-hmm. (Empire Records)
82. Randy: I can’t put my arms down! (A Christmas Story)
81. Hansel: Sting would be another person who's a hero. The music he's created over the years, I don't really listen to it, but the fact that he's making it, I respect that. (Zoolander)
Monday, February 12, 2007
The First One...
As is my custom, I was scanning the hyperlinks on IMDB this morning, when I stumbled across one that said: 7 Actors Discuss the First Films That Influenced Them from NYTimes.com. "Oooooooh!" I said to myself, in the manner of Toy Story's little green aliens, and clicked the link. What followed was a 9-minute film of Cate Blanchett, Brad Pitt, Helen Mirren, Abbie Cornish, Ken Watanabe, Penelope Cruz and Leonardo Dicaprio all discussing the movies that most influenced their lives.
This got me thinking...is there one movie that really changed my life? If so, what is it?
That's a tough question. Frankly, I don't remember the first movie I ever saw, either in a theatre or on VHS. For some reason, that one event doesn't stand out...wonder why?
So I started exploring the recesses of my mind, pushing aside the cobwebs of age, and soon the movies from my childhood began flooding back to my conscious. The Goonies, always among my top picks, is one of the greatest movies of my generation. The Princess Bride had the unprecedented ability to affect me differently as a child and as an adult.I watched A New Hope and Return of the Jedi so many times that I broke the tapes. Three Men and a Baby...I think I actually broke the video store's copy of that. My personal Jim Henson favorites: Muppets Take Manhattan and The Dark Crystal. The equally dark Neverending Story and Return to Oz. I even had a few classics that I loved growing up: Little Women (with Liz Taylor), The Wizard of Oz and The Music Man (with Robert Preston), all personal favorites when I visited with my grandmother.
However, as I thought of these titles, none really jumped out at me as the catalyst of my movie obsession. Sure, I loved them and watched them obsessively, but did any of them fuel me to a level of devotion that would inspire me to write this blog? No, I don't think so. So what did it? What film put me over the edge of "casual movie-goer"? As I watched Jake Paltrow's short film, listening to each actor describe their favorite audience-member moments, one movie kept popping into my head. It wasn't an instance from my childhood. It wasn't a movie someone insisted I watch. It wasn't even at a movie theatre. But seeing this movie opened my eyes to hundreds, even thousands, of movies I wasn't willing to take a chance on before.
Picture if you will...The tiny village of Steinbach, Germany, 1996. I, nearing that all important 18th birthday, was on a study abroad. Most of the channels on TV were obviously in German, but I did have two English options: Sky News (booooring) and the European version of TNT. This TNT was not all westerns like it was at home. No, this TNT spent half its day as Cartoon Network and the other half of its day as TCM. It was early into my month-long trip to Deutschland that I saw...Singin' in the Rain.
Of course I'd heard of Singin' in the Rain. Basically every list of the "greatest movies ever made" includes it. We sang the title song in Girl Scouts. I don't remember exactly what I was
expecting...probably that it was going to be a drama, probably that I was going to roll my eyes a lot. But it was either that or the news...so naturally, I chose the movie.
From the opening credits to The End, I was mesmerized. The movie was absolutely incredible. It was funny, a real surprise to me. It laughed at Hollywood during the late '20s to early '30s, when silent pictures faded and talkies took the reigns. The love story was not overly "cheesy" (a problem I generally have with musicals), but rather sweet and added to the appeal of the story. It's a true movie-lovers movie but doesn't exclude the rest of its audience. The music was timeless and the phenomenal dancing by Gene Kelly, Donald O'Conner and Debbie Reynolds has never been equaled.
Musicals aren't for everyone but you may find Singin' in the Rain the exception. Marvelous story. Superb characters. Awe-inspiring dancing.
TCM's ad said it best:
"There's no such thing as classic movies. Just great films you've never seen before."
This got me thinking...is there one movie that really changed my life? If so, what is it?
That's a tough question. Frankly, I don't remember the first movie I ever saw, either in a theatre or on VHS. For some reason, that one event doesn't stand out...wonder why?
So I started exploring the recesses of my mind, pushing aside the cobwebs of age, and soon the movies from my childhood began flooding back to my conscious. The Goonies, always among my top picks, is one of the greatest movies of my generation. The Princess Bride had the unprecedented ability to affect me differently as a child and as an adult.I watched A New Hope and Return of the Jedi so many times that I broke the tapes. Three Men and a Baby...I think I actually broke the video store's copy of that. My personal Jim Henson favorites: Muppets Take Manhattan and The Dark Crystal. The equally dark Neverending Story and Return to Oz. I even had a few classics that I loved growing up: Little Women (with Liz Taylor), The Wizard of Oz and The Music Man (with Robert Preston), all personal favorites when I visited with my grandmother.
However, as I thought of these titles, none really jumped out at me as the catalyst of my movie obsession. Sure, I loved them and watched them obsessively, but did any of them fuel me to a level of devotion that would inspire me to write this blog? No, I don't think so. So what did it? What film put me over the edge of "casual movie-goer"? As I watched Jake Paltrow's short film, listening to each actor describe their favorite audience-member moments, one movie kept popping into my head. It wasn't an instance from my childhood. It wasn't a movie someone insisted I watch. It wasn't even at a movie theatre. But seeing this movie opened my eyes to hundreds, even thousands, of movies I wasn't willing to take a chance on before.
Picture if you will...The tiny village of Steinbach, Germany, 1996. I, nearing that all important 18th birthday, was on a study abroad. Most of the channels on TV were obviously in German, but I did have two English options: Sky News (booooring) and the European version of TNT. This TNT was not all westerns like it was at home. No, this TNT spent half its day as Cartoon Network and the other half of its day as TCM. It was early into my month-long trip to Deutschland that I saw...Singin' in the Rain.
Of course I'd heard of Singin' in the Rain. Basically every list of the "greatest movies ever made" includes it. We sang the title song in Girl Scouts. I don't remember exactly what I was
expecting...probably that it was going to be a drama, probably that I was going to roll my eyes a lot. But it was either that or the news...so naturally, I chose the movie.From the opening credits to The End, I was mesmerized. The movie was absolutely incredible. It was funny, a real surprise to me. It laughed at Hollywood during the late '20s to early '30s, when silent pictures faded and talkies took the reigns. The love story was not overly "cheesy" (a problem I generally have with musicals), but rather sweet and added to the appeal of the story. It's a true movie-lovers movie but doesn't exclude the rest of its audience. The music was timeless and the phenomenal dancing by Gene Kelly, Donald O'Conner and Debbie Reynolds has never been equaled.
Musicals aren't for everyone but you may find Singin' in the Rain the exception. Marvelous story. Superb characters. Awe-inspiring dancing.
TCM's ad said it best:
"There's no such thing as classic movies. Just great films you've never seen before."
Strictly Ballroom & Blow Dry
The Commonwealth Comedies...
I've decided to take a moment to draw your attention, good reader, to a self-designated genre of movie. I am calling it: the Commonwealth Comedy. You're probably familiar with this sort of flick; they may even be listed amongst your favorites. This humourous film generally centers on a somewhat odd, yet real, scenario and introduces its audience to an eccentric group of heroes and villains. Most importantly, these movies tend to originate from Great Britain or one of their many remaining commonwealths. Thus, the Commonwealth Comedy. Thank you, thank you. I’ll be here all week, please try the veal!
In this review, I will be focusing on two of my personal favorites: Strictly Ballroom and Blow Dry.
Baz Luhrmann's pre-Moulin Rouge tale, Strictly Ballroom, takes us behind the scenes of Australia's ballroom dancing subculture. I discovered this movie thanks to another cinematic staple of my young life: Swing Kids. Ballroom’s trailer was at the beginning of my VHS tape which I viewed no less than 1500 times. On a whim, when I was visiting from college, my Mom rented this Aussie flick for us to watch. I was absolutely floored. Luhrmann's knack for using color and movement to accentuate the musicality of his films is always astounding and magnificently reminiscent of the old Hollywood musicals. Add to that, the characters' manic obsession with ballroom dancing and attaining that one all-important goal, being Pan Pacific Grand Prix Champions, and you've got a hilarious and uplifting story that never fails to impress. Well, never fails to impress me anyway! This vastly under-appreciated film definitely deserves a viewing. I’m sure that there are some of you who may not have enjoyed Moulin Rouge (how that’s possible is beyond me!) but I implore you to give Strictly Ballroom a chance…because, to quote the movie: “Vivir con miedo, es como vivir a medias.” A life lived in fear, is a life half-lived.
I shan't lie. I did not watch Blow Dry because of good reviews. I did not watch Blow Dry because its trailer looked intriguing. I did not even watch Blow Dry because I knew what it was about. No, I watched Blow Dry because Josh Hartnett was in it. Shameful, I know, but I cannot and will not deny the fact that he's pretty. I’ve seen a number of movies in my day and I am ecstatic to say that Blow Dry is definitely not your typical eye-candy movie. In this little English gem, we meet a peculiar group of elegantly coiffeured hair-styling competitors who are competing for the annual British Hairdressing Championship. An all-star cast including Alan Rickman, Natasha Richardson, Bill Nighy, Rachel Griffiths and Heidi Klum joins Harnett in this endearing little comedy. Harnett proves that he’s not just a talent-less pretty face. He manages to impress even the harshest “accent critics” (namely me), by holding his Yorkshire accent quite convincingly throughout the film. However, it’s the film’s characters and the absurdity of glorifying the use of outlandish quantities of hairspray, glitter and hair accessories they use that makes it a truly splendid thing to watch. Stylish and silly. Charming and captivating. I loved this movie.
Now, I beg of you your wisdom. Do you know other movies that would fit into this genre? “Cheesy” little flicks from the land that gave us tea and scones or kangaroos and Steve Irwin. Please, comment and impart your knowledge on the masses.
I've decided to take a moment to draw your attention, good reader, to a self-designated genre of movie. I am calling it: the Commonwealth Comedy. You're probably familiar with this sort of flick; they may even be listed amongst your favorites. This humourous film generally centers on a somewhat odd, yet real, scenario and introduces its audience to an eccentric group of heroes and villains. Most importantly, these movies tend to originate from Great Britain or one of their many remaining commonwealths. Thus, the Commonwealth Comedy. Thank you, thank you. I’ll be here all week, please try the veal!
In this review, I will be focusing on two of my personal favorites: Strictly Ballroom and Blow Dry.
Baz Luhrmann's pre-Moulin Rouge tale, Strictly Ballroom, takes us behind the scenes of Australia's ballroom dancing subculture. I discovered this movie thanks to another cinematic staple of my young life: Swing Kids. Ballroom’s trailer was at the beginning of my VHS tape which I viewed no less than 1500 times. On a whim, when I was visiting from college, my Mom rented this Aussie flick for us to watch. I was absolutely floored. Luhrmann's knack for using color and movement to accentuate the musicality of his films is always astounding and magnificently reminiscent of the old Hollywood musicals. Add to that, the characters' manic obsession with ballroom dancing and attaining that one all-important goal, being Pan Pacific Grand Prix Champions, and you've got a hilarious and uplifting story that never fails to impress. Well, never fails to impress me anyway! This vastly under-appreciated film definitely deserves a viewing. I’m sure that there are some of you who may not have enjoyed Moulin Rouge (how that’s possible is beyond me!) but I implore you to give Strictly Ballroom a chance…because, to quote the movie: “Vivir con miedo, es como vivir a medias.” A life lived in fear, is a life half-lived.
I shan't lie. I did not watch Blow Dry because of good reviews. I did not watch Blow Dry because its trailer looked intriguing. I did not even watch Blow Dry because I knew what it was about. No, I watched Blow Dry because Josh Hartnett was in it. Shameful, I know, but I cannot and will not deny the fact that he's pretty. I’ve seen a number of movies in my day and I am ecstatic to say that Blow Dry is definitely not your typical eye-candy movie. In this little English gem, we meet a peculiar group of elegantly coiffeured hair-styling competitors who are competing for the annual British Hairdressing Championship. An all-star cast including Alan Rickman, Natasha Richardson, Bill Nighy, Rachel Griffiths and Heidi Klum joins Harnett in this endearing little comedy. Harnett proves that he’s not just a talent-less pretty face. He manages to impress even the harshest “accent critics” (namely me), by holding his Yorkshire accent quite convincingly throughout the film. However, it’s the film’s characters and the absurdity of glorifying the use of outlandish quantities of hairspray, glitter and hair accessories they use that makes it a truly splendid thing to watch. Stylish and silly. Charming and captivating. I loved this movie.
Now, I beg of you your wisdom. Do you know other movies that would fit into this genre? “Cheesy” little flicks from the land that gave us tea and scones or kangaroos and Steve Irwin. Please, comment and impart your knowledge on the masses.
Sunday, February 4, 2007
The Holiday
A Holiday for $1.25
Once a year Americans turn up the testosterone for a three-hour game. Bring out the beer, bring out the chips, bring out the best commercials of the year!
So what do I do? Pull out my $1.25 and head off to the dollar theatre, naturally.
For well over a month, I've avoided the cheesy romantic movie The Holiday. Reviews were not flattering (unless the reviewer in question was unequivocally enamoured of Jude Law), so I decided against seeing it. However, as friends and family began sending me favourable reports, I had a change of heart and opted for a late matinee this afternoon.
Let me state for the record how pleasantly surprised I was by this movie. I don't know about you guys, but I love movies that talk about other movies. It's like the writer is trying to pass on little secrets to those of us who can recognize them. I nearly jumped out of my chair when I caught a 3 second glimpse of His Girl Friday and chuckled merrily at the mention of The Lady Eve and speculated that the Irene Dunne movie Kate Winslett watched was more than likely The Awful Truth.
These are my favorite moments. This is why I go to the movies.
** Caution: Estrogen approaching on Testosterone Appreciation Day! **
I like a romantic comedy as much as the next girl, but I'm picky. I expect predictability. I expect a cookie-cutter cast (girl, bad guy, nice guy, best friend, etc). Yet there needs to be a little something that sets it apart. I think Faith said it best when she recommended it to me, "They have cool jobs!" It's true. I loved that Jack Black was a composer and that Cameron Diaz was a movie trailer editor. The fact that she thought of every aspect of her life as a trailer narrated by the trailer guy was great! (I so do that) These characters were people I could really identify with. While I find myself more a Kate Winslett than Cameron Diaz...I think we all (men included...admit it or not) see ourselves in these roles. Unrequited love...yes, yes. Collosal pricks...yes, yes. Perfect men? Nah, romantic comedies only. :)
This movie met all my requirements, with one exception: Jude Law and Cameron Diaz both had very cheesy moments at the end that garnered an exasperated eye-roll and groan out of me. Otherwise, the movie was fun and sweet and endearing. 4 Stars
And, Madame Writer/Director, I wanna know what else was on Eli Wallach's list of 15 movies Kate was supposed to watch. I hope it included The Philadelphia Story. :)
Once a year Americans turn up the testosterone for a three-hour game. Bring out the beer, bring out the chips, bring out the best commercials of the year!So what do I do? Pull out my $1.25 and head off to the dollar theatre, naturally.
For well over a month, I've avoided the cheesy romantic movie The Holiday. Reviews were not flattering (unless the reviewer in question was unequivocally enamoured of Jude Law), so I decided against seeing it. However, as friends and family began sending me favourable reports, I had a change of heart and opted for a late matinee this afternoon.
Let me state for the record how pleasantly surprised I was by this movie. I don't know about you guys, but I love movies that talk about other movies. It's like the writer is trying to pass on little secrets to those of us who can recognize them. I nearly jumped out of my chair when I caught a 3 second glimpse of His Girl Friday and chuckled merrily at the mention of The Lady Eve and speculated that the Irene Dunne movie Kate Winslett watched was more than likely The Awful Truth.
These are my favorite moments. This is why I go to the movies.
** Caution: Estrogen approaching on Testosterone Appreciation Day! **
I like a romantic comedy as much as the next girl, but I'm picky. I expect predictability. I expect a cookie-cutter cast (girl, bad guy, nice guy, best friend, etc). Yet there needs to be a little something that sets it apart. I think Faith said it best when she recommended it to me, "They have cool jobs!" It's true. I loved that Jack Black was a composer and that Cameron Diaz was a movie trailer editor. The fact that she thought of every aspect of her life as a trailer narrated by the trailer guy was great! (I so do that) These characters were people I could really identify with. While I find myself more a Kate Winslett than Cameron Diaz...I think we all (men included...admit it or not) see ourselves in these roles. Unrequited love...yes, yes. Collosal pricks...yes, yes. Perfect men? Nah, romantic comedies only. :)
This movie met all my requirements, with one exception: Jude Law and Cameron Diaz both had very cheesy moments at the end that garnered an exasperated eye-roll and groan out of me. Otherwise, the movie was fun and sweet and endearing. 4 Stars
And, Madame Writer/Director, I wanna know what else was on Eli Wallach's list of 15 movies Kate was supposed to watch. I hope it included The Philadelphia Story. :)
Saturday, February 3, 2007
Reviews in 50 words or less...
Time for the first issue of k8's Reviews in 50 Words or Less! These reviews come from my Netflix notes. No doubt there will be more where this comes from!
Kinky Boots - 4 Stars
Cute, funny, sweet and heart-warming. If you liked Calendar Girls, The Full Monty and Billy Elliot give it a shot! Chiwetel Ejiofor is great!! (and he looks WAY too good in those boots!)
Pearl Harbor - 1 star (I'm very gracious)
The only solace I have is that I didn't pay to get in, but that can NEVER take away the pain it caused me
Midnight Cowboy - 4 Stars
Fabulous acting by Hoffman. Definitely one of his best! Loved the dynamic between Rizzo and Joe. Joe's innocence and naiveté. Rizzo's gritty tenacity. Their curious devotion to each other. Great!!
Foul Play - 4 Stars
Good, fun, 70's-era Chevy Chase humor. Gotta love it!
National Treasure - 2 Stars
This was better when it was called "Sahara" and starred Matthew McConaughey and Steve Zahn. Hee hee
The Sure Thing - 4 Stars
Four words: Tim Robbins sings showtunes! Need I say more?
The Pest - Negative 5 Million Stars
This movie (tho I only saw it once), has continued to insult my intelligence for the past 12 years. John, I liked you MUCH better as Luigi & the little latino boy in drag.
Manhattan Murder Mystery - 4 Stars
For Me? Rear Window meets Vertigo meets noire w/a twist of Double Indemnity! Fun fun FUN!!!
Save the Last Dance - 1 Star
Without Julia Styles, this movie MIGHT have been bearable...but that's doubtful. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Brokeback Mountain - 4 Stars
Wonderfully made movie, worth every nod!! But apparently...I'm dead inside.
Batman Begins - 4 Stars
Loses a star for having the AUDACITY to cast Katie Holmes. Christian Bale is now my favorite Batman!
The Brothers Grimm - 3 Stars
VERY predictable. Climax was stupid. But characters were FANTABULOUSLY GREAT!!!
American Psycho - 3 Stars
*SHUDDER*
Honourable Mention:
The Island - Negative 8 Billion Stars
Mother of God...will someone kick Michael Bay? A good swift kick to the shins...with a spiky battering ram.
Kinky Boots - 4 Stars
Cute, funny, sweet and heart-warming. If you liked Calendar Girls, The Full Monty and Billy Elliot give it a shot! Chiwetel Ejiofor is great!! (and he looks WAY too good in those boots!)
Pearl Harbor - 1 star (I'm very gracious)
The only solace I have is that I didn't pay to get in, but that can NEVER take away the pain it caused me
Midnight Cowboy - 4 Stars
Fabulous acting by Hoffman. Definitely one of his best! Loved the dynamic between Rizzo and Joe. Joe's innocence and naiveté. Rizzo's gritty tenacity. Their curious devotion to each other. Great!!
Foul Play - 4 Stars
Good, fun, 70's-era Chevy Chase humor. Gotta love it!
National Treasure - 2 Stars
This was better when it was called "Sahara" and starred Matthew McConaughey and Steve Zahn. Hee hee
The Sure Thing - 4 Stars
Four words: Tim Robbins sings showtunes! Need I say more?
The Pest - Negative 5 Million Stars
This movie (tho I only saw it once), has continued to insult my intelligence for the past 12 years. John, I liked you MUCH better as Luigi & the little latino boy in drag.
Manhattan Murder Mystery - 4 Stars
For Me? Rear Window meets Vertigo meets noire w/a twist of Double Indemnity! Fun fun FUN!!!
Save the Last Dance - 1 Star
Without Julia Styles, this movie MIGHT have been bearable...but that's doubtful. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Brokeback Mountain - 4 Stars
Wonderfully made movie, worth every nod!! But apparently...I'm dead inside.
Batman Begins - 4 Stars
Loses a star for having the AUDACITY to cast Katie Holmes. Christian Bale is now my favorite Batman!
The Brothers Grimm - 3 Stars
VERY predictable. Climax was stupid. But characters were FANTABULOUSLY GREAT!!!
American Psycho - 3 Stars
*SHUDDER*
Honourable Mention:
The Island - Negative 8 Billion Stars
Mother of God...will someone kick Michael Bay? A good swift kick to the shins...with a spiky battering ram.
Thursday, February 1, 2007
The Island
The Island...OF CRAP!!!
This review was originally written in June of 2006. I am including it partly to add bulk to my growing blog…and partly because I think it would be nice to have a bad review amongst good ones. :)
I think we can all agree that movie tastes differ. Even people who tend to like the same things will disagree from time to time. Such was the case between me and my dear friend who, for her own safety, shall remain nameless (but you know who you are). She came down for a visit and a lovely weekend full of movies and games, always a pleasure…until she pulled it out of her bag. Michael Bay’s
My opinion of her movie recommendations has taken a sharp and severe dive.
Before I start in on this movie’s inadequacies, it is necessary to give credit where credit’s due. This movie did have one redeeming value. Yes, only one. Ewan McGregor looked mighty fine in that burgundy turtleneck.
Every other part of that movie has caused me numerous convulsions, both during and after. Still, in all fairness, I went into this movie with extreme bias. First, Faith (of “In My Opinion” fame) had told me that the only redeeming value was Ewan's turtle neck (check) and the spectacular fight scene that pits real-life Ewan against his cloned counterpart. Unfortunately, I was so mad by that point in the movie, the humour was hard to appreciate. Second, I saw MST3K's Parts: The CLONUS Horror (starring Peter Graves) which was the same freakin' movie AND IT WASN'T GOOD THEN EITHER!!!!
NOTE: for explanation of the above Baynito Michaelini and Movie™,
Finally, I really just did not want to watch it. Period. End of sentence. My friend had already extensively explained the entire plot to me. I could already tell it sucked. I didn't need visual confirmation. It would be one thing if there was no other way to get a decent Ewan-Fix...but I have Moulin Rouge. I'll be ok.
Now that I've had time to de-stress (after that 2 hours and 16 minutes of my life I'll never get back) I am thinking with a little more clarity. Let's compare, shall we, The Island with MI:2. These two Movies™ are exactly the same. They both wield the Symbolism™ Club of Pain, the I-Have-a-Message-and-you're-gonna-sit-there-until-I'm-done Chains of Bondage and the Look-How-Much-I-Can-Blow-Up-in-30-Seconds Button of Destruction. Why, then, did I praise MI:2 for it's hilarity and spit repeatedly on The Island for it's insulting incompetence? I can't say. It doesn't make sense. But it is true.
I blame Michael Bay. It must be his fault. That can be the only answer.
The one thought that begs meditation is this: Why do I even care? Why do I let a movie so obviously created for people who aren’t me, cause my poor little self so much strife and frustration? I believe it is emotional duress created by the Movie™.
In summation: Even if this movie starred ME along-side Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, Colin Ferrell, Ewan McGregor and Christian Bale and involved some pretty intense "action"...I WOULD STILL NOT WANT TO SEE IT. Well, ok, maybe I'm being a bit hasty, but I think you all get my point. Michael Bay, even though I didn't spend a single red cent on this movie…I want my money back. I'm claiming "emotional duress."
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